Another Look Podcast
Another Look Podcast is a podcast where we discuss our splinters and planks of wood in the American church. The purpose of this podcast is to have frank and honest dialogue about the role of the church and the role of the believer in America today. Our goal is to take "another look" at who we are and realign our spirits properly. It will hurt initially but the end result will always be a beautiful masterpiece in the Potter's hands.
Another Look Podcast
Don't Wait For Tomorrow: A Raw Conversation About Death And What Truly Matters
Some conversations are born from the deepest parts of our hearts. This is one of them.
Tonight, Minister Ken sets aside his prepared content to address something weighing heavily on his soul: the recent loss of childhood friends from Willingboro, New Jersey. With raw emotion, he reflects on the passing of Kevin Hayes, who taught him to play drums, and Robbie Parlow, a member of R&B group City High.
"Death is sobering," Minister Ken shares, reflecting on Scripture that compares our lives to vapor appearing briefly before vanishing away. This stark reality propels an urgent message: don't waste precious time on petty grievances. Tell your loved ones you love them today—not because tomorrow isn't promised, but because they matter right now.
The episode takes an introspective turn as Minister Ken reveals how a missed opportunity to share his faith with a friend who later committed suicide became a driving force behind his ministry. "You never know who you reach when you share the word of God from the heart," he explains, emphasizing that his purpose isn't about likes or subscribers, but reaching "those people in the shadows" who feel unseen yet desperately need to hear they matter.
For anyone grieving, Minister Ken offers compassionate counsel: grieve with purpose, at your own pace, but avoid isolation. His message culminates in a powerful invitation to live with eternity in mind—focusing not merely on tomorrow, but "the tomorrow after tomorrow."
Whether you're processing loss, questioning your purpose, or seeking deeper meaning, this episode offers profound perspective on what truly matters in our brief, vapor-like existence. Listen, reflect, and perhaps find exactly what your heart needs to hear today.
Please feel free to leave us your prayer request, comments, and feedback at our website at https://anotherlookpodcast.buzzsprout.com or https://podpage.com/another-look-podcast/.
You are precious and loved beloved. Keep pressing forward towards Jesus.
Welcome to Another Look Podcast. At Another Look Podcast, we go beyond the norm and literally take another look at our life in Christ. We keep an open heart and mind so we can reach, teach and love all of God's creation. Whether you are a novice or veteran in this walk, this podcast is for you. You ready for something new, something that will challenge your thinking and heart? Are you willing and ready to unlearn in order to learn, willing to tear down so God can rebuild? Good, let's get up and go. People are waiting for us. Let's go fishing hey, good evening.
Speaker 2:This is brother ken from another look podcast. Um, it's a friday evening. Usually I don't do this on friday evening, but I ain't gonna lie, my heart is heavy tonight. Um, tonight I'm hoping you can indulge me for a few minutes, maybe longer. You know I teach, I share the word, one of the other things I do. That's my calling, that's my anointing, my trade. You know I'm a lawyer. I manage litigation very well, respected commercial lender do a lot of things, but my calling is to preach, is to share the word of God, and usually I do that.
Speaker 2:Tonight is going to be different. Maybe you'll see a little bit of me and what I'm about to say and what I'm about to share. Tonight is going to be different. Maybe you'll see a little bit of me and what I'm about to say and what I'm about to share. My initial agenda tonight was to put out some content, some scriptures, some things that God has put on my heart to share with you, because it's been a while I think the last time I shared was in June and we're at the end of July and I've been getting a lot of emails, a lot of responses back on my pages that you know. We're looking for you, bro, where you at. I'm coming with it Next two episodes.
Speaker 2:I'll have some things for you, but I need to talk frank tonight and hopefully, hopefully, for those who know my heart, you know where I'm coming from, because my heart is heavy. My heart is heavy, man. My heart is really heavy. I haven't felt this kind of heaviness since my mom passed. But I'm hurting. I'm just hurting, and my hurt is not because of anything happening in my personal life. It's because of the hurt I'm feeling from people that I knew, that I grew up with, that are now gone. And you know it's tough. I tell people this Death is sobering. Death is so sobering.
Speaker 2:I look at you, know what David said, what James said in the book of James, james 4.14. It says whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow, for what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. David said it like this in Psalms 39.5 even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. David said it like this in Psalms 39.5. Indeed, you have made my days as hand breaths and my ages as nothing before you. Certainly, every man at his best state is but vapor. Even in verse 11, he goes down and says when, with rebukes, you correct man for iniquity, you make his beauty melt away like a moth. Surely, every man is a vapor, and I feel that tonight. I feel that tonight, so I'm sure y'all are wondering.
Speaker 2:You know what's going on with this brother, so let me share with you some things that's on my heart. You know, one thing I've learned is that, you know, at my age I'm 57 you know, and I shared before, that when you get older, when I was young, you know, I guess you could say we live life looking through the front glass of a car going 100 miles an hour. We were so always looking forward to what's ahead of us. When you get older, you live your life through the rearview mirror Instead of the front window, because you start looking at where you've come from, you start looking back at things. You start looking at things differently Because now you know, most of your years are already behind you and there are less years in front of you. So you live your life looking backwards To see where you've come from, but also sometimes you live looking at regrets of things you wish you had done better, and I have those moments. I'm sure you do too.
Speaker 2:But one thing I will say is this you know, for all of us this applies to all of us, not just me, not just you Life is so short. Don't waste your time on the petty mess. If you have loved ones that you haven't told you love them, tell them. Don't wait till tomorrow. Tell them Because there's no guarantee they will be there when you wake up in the morning, and there's no guarantee you will be there. But I'm saying to tell them, not because you know, not only because you don't know if you have a tomorrow, but tell them because they matter today. If you have to get something right with someone that you wrong, get it right. Don't wait till tomorrow, you know.
Speaker 1:God help me on this one.
Speaker 2:So let me just get into what I know, you know. So you know I'm a proud New Jersey native. I'm proud of that. My family is originally from Hemingway, south Carolina. I'm proud of that. But as my uncle says, my home is always going to be New Jersey. My parents, when they moved from South Carolina to New Jersey, the first place they moved to was Newark, new Jersey. My father bought a house Littleton Avenue.
Speaker 2:I wasn't born at that time but after I was born we visited Newark on a weekly basis because my uncles, my maternal uncles and aunts lived in Newark on Dayton Street. So going to Newark was like a regular rite of passage. Every week We'd play in the graveyard, the cemetery, right across from Dayton Avenue. Just imagine the senior seeing good times with those projects. That's where they lived. One lived in one building. My uncle Jesse and his family lived in one building. My uncle Jesse and his family lived in one building. My uncle George and his family lived in the other building and we would visit because those were my mom's brothers. It was a good life, it was good man, it was good.
Speaker 2:And you know, when I was born my parents moved to East Orange, new Jersey. We kept the house in Newark but we moved to 119th Street in East Orange. When I was born, my parents moved to East Orange, new Jersey. We kept the house in Newark but we moved to 119th Street in East Orange when I was born. I was born in East Orange Hospital. I don't remember much about East Orange, except that my cousin Terry and my cousin Joe and all those would come visit. But by the time I was able to really recognize childhood, my father already relocated us to Willingboro, new Jersey, which is what I call home. I was born in East Orange but I was raised in Willingboro. Willingboro, new Jersey. Exit 5 off the New Jersey Turnpike is my home.
Speaker 2:You know when people can say what they want. I guess since we moved they call it killing borough. But it's not. It's always going to be Willingboro. A lot of good times and there was always some tough times.
Speaker 2:But Willingboro, especially for a person of color, was a gem. No, it didn't start out that way. We moved there in 1969 before. There were a lot of people of color. It was integrated but it was rough going for people who were there in the early 70s and the mid-70s. We were called out of our name and you know the N-word a lot, but it still turned into something beautiful. By the 80s there were more of us and it became such a beautiful place and it was still integrated and people of color got along with people who were not of color and we all just got along. You know, we all saw things differently.
Speaker 2:Now I know that's not the way it is now, but Willingboro will always be a special place, so much so that when we had our children, one of the things I wanted to do was move back there to be closer to my mom and dad, because they still had their house on Northampton Drive, but also because I wanted my kids to see what it was like to grow up in a town that was pretty much governed by people that look like them, being taught by people that look like them, because the world is not the same. Most of America, and honestly most of the world, is not run by people of color. But I thought it was important my children had to see that and get to see that before we moved away. And we had to move away because it got a little rough. And I don't regret moving, but there were some things I do miss about it, but I'm staying on that.
Speaker 2:To say this, growing up in Warmborough had a good friend, had a lot of good friends. One of the guys who helped me learn how to play the drums real well was a guy named Kevin Hayes. Man, he was an amazing drummer and, you know, I would stay after school and he would show me some drum techniques and it got to a point where we would do what's called shedding, which is where we would basically just do a jam session after school on the drums. Ken was a really good guy. Never said a bad word out of his mouth, man, as far as dogging you out, he was always, you know, good people.
Speaker 2:And I found out, you know, today, that he passed in march of this year. And it hit home, man, because you know not that you can passed in March of this year. And it hit home, man, because you know not that you can keep up with everybody. But, man, I was a guy I wish I had kept up with, you know, because the last time I saw him he actually came to the church I was at in New Jersey. We were giving him a move and he saw me playing the drums and he looked at me and smiled and just winked his eye like I see you bro, you back at it again. It was good man. I wish I had talked to him, but so much was going on, he had left by the time I came down off the set. But it hurts because I mean he was a good brother man and I wouldn't be anywhere near as good a drummer without Kevin helping me along. The one thing that kind of hit home with me today was I wouldn't be anywhere near as good a drummer without Kevin helping me along.
Speaker 2:The one thing that kind of hit home with me today was, in addition to finding out about Kevin passing away, I found out that a good brother, rob Parlow, passed away. And you know, rob, that's Kevin. They're from Willingboro and it's crazy because you know, growing up, you know we were in high school, my junior and senior year in high school, me and Rob's brother, greg, formed a band called Lost Cause. It was me, greg, steven Allen, maurice Cook, my boy, maurice, tracy McKelvin man and Jai Quick and we formed a group and we just would go over to Jai's house and just jam, kick it out, and every so often we'd go over to Greg's house in Twin Hills and Robbie would be there. He was a little kid and he'd be there and watch us practice and just sit and stare. We would go for hours but he'd be fascinated. You know Robbie later grew up to become an amazing singer, was one of the three people in a group called City High. Y'all know their song what Would you Do, along with Ryan Tobey and Claudette Ortiz all Willowboro natives and you know they broke apart.
Speaker 2:But you know I didn't really I wasn't like hanging out with Robbie or anything like that. I wasn't like as close to him as like Ryan Toby and Claudette and all them. But you know we just dialogued a little back and forth on Facebook. You know little comments here and there. And then I think the last communication I had with robbie he had said something crazy. You know doing eagles talk. He was like cursing up a storm. I've ever reached out to him say yo, bro, you're right, man, just dm him. And he's like it's cool, man, it's cool.
Speaker 2:And one of the things that I surprisingly got back when I started the podcast. I don't know what the episode was, but he reached out to me and said man, I appreciate that you sharing man, appreciate that scripture and the word he said I'm listening to you, bro, and I lifted at that man. I guess the thing that sticks with me, man, is that you know, to know that he was listening to the podcast, to know that he was trying his best, he had his demons we all do. We can't judge. The brother was trying man, but it just hurts to know that you know someone who was trying to do better, and I'm sure he wasn't, and I'm just going to be crazy enough to believe that somehow someway, because at the end of my episodes there's a prayer of faith. If it wasn't through that maybe it was God sending someone else. But I'm still believing and hoping that he received the Lord before he went on, passed away yesterday, the 17th, in Willingboro, no less surrounded by his family, willingboro, no less surrounded by his family.
Speaker 2:So I offer our condolences from another little podcast, to his family man, first of all, his wife, anika Parlow, and his two children, larrick and Cord, and to his mom, miss Marion Parlow, who was really instrumental for us at another look, not another podcast at when we did Common, I'm sorry, lost, call Us, the band we were in. She was really nice to us, man, and especially to his brother, my boy Craig Parlow, man who graduated class of 86, wimbledon High School, pulled a surprise winning poet and professor man, good brother. Man, good brother, professor man, good brother man, good brother and uh man, also to his crew, um, Ryan Tobey and his um and Claudette Ortiz. Man Just wishing y'all, keeping y'all in our prayers, hoping and praying that while you grieve, that Holy Spirit comfort you and shield you from all hurt, harm. Hoping and praying that while you grieve, that Holy Spirit comforts you and shields you from all hurt, harm and danger. Man Gives you peace in this time of hardship. Man, and you know one thing I want to share with y'all why I feel I do what I do.
Speaker 2:You know, when I was younger I mean, I was saved since I was 11 years old I wasn't almost the best Christianist. I'm sure y'all weren't either but in my teen years it was hard for me to share my faith because I was struggling with so many different things man, self-esteem, different struggles with trying to be, trying to be a son to my father and my mother man. It was like dealing with a lot of rejection, stuff like that and um. But one thing that stuck with me, that drove me to who I am today, was a situation where you know, when I was in high school I worked at a movie theater called the Fox Theater A good couple of Robins, they were good man, they treated me nice.
Speaker 2:They hired me Partially mainly because I was a martial artist. I was a second degree black belt and he had just, you know, wombro was rough, so he was in a situation where he would get hit by people and he needed protection. So you know, people knew me and Wombro, you know that if you gonna come at me you better prepare for my feet to hit you in your face. I didn't play. Mr Robbins knew that, so he hired me. In addition, he hired my boy, troy, who was a football player, troy Bratton, or the Reverend, the right Reverend, troy Bratton hey, troy.
Speaker 2:But he hired this other young man called Kevin. His name was Kevin. Kevin was like a jokester, he was a prankster, he was younger than me and Troy and me and Troy would also clown him a lot. But he would come up there, he'd hang around us. I guess to him we were his big brothers and you know we would joke. But you know I wasn't one to kind of talk about God or anything like that. And you know, eventually life changed, changed. I went to college, came back to Willingboro sporadically for my breaks and for the summer, but I never really caught up with Kevin and Troy kept up with Kevin more because Troy stayed on what I went on and stayed in contact with Kevin. But eventually, you know, troy went to college too With Paul Quinn in Texas, where he met his lovely wife Teresa, and you know he grew on too.
Speaker 2:But I remember one day after I graduated college I came home and I read in the newspaper that Kevin had committed suicide, drove off a bridge with his two twin sons. Hit me like a brick man man, that's tough. Hit me like a brick Because in the back of my mind, in addition to grieving the loss, I kept wondering could I have made a difference if I shared the gospel with them? It convicted me, it stuck with me for years, even when I was in college, doing everything I knew how to do that I thought I was grown enough to do, I could. There were times I ain't gonna lie, I'll be honest I'd be high as a kite, drunk or whatever, and in the back of my mind I'd still be thinking about that. I guess in some ways I was trying to drown out the guilt and the conviction. I felt that had I shared more of Christ with him, maybe he wouldn't have done what he did.
Speaker 2:Eventually, in my senior year, I really even though I was saved, I call it I really gave my life to Christ and I won't go into a lot of detail about that. But my life changed and then my trajectory changed. I began living for the Lord. As imperfect as I was, I began to make the effort to live for the Lord. I studied the Word. I got around people who were Christians, even to a point where my boys we call them thick as thieves. We were really tight Matt, chris, clayton, thurman, all of us, troy, of course, derek. We would all hang out in different areas and spots and, as you know, they were all in my groom's party. So it's crazy because by the time I moved to Delaware after we got married, all my boys got saved. I was so on fire for the Lord. We led them all to the Lord.
Speaker 2:I'm not taking any credit for that, because it was only the move of God. You know, since that time Chris has gone home with the Lord. Last year or earlier this year he was my mentor for being a lawyer, because he was the first person that showed me that a black man could practice law. And I mean Chris was like that brother. He went to Cornell and Georgetown, but Chris was man and under all that Chris was a good brother. He loved the Lord. He actually joined the church I grew up in and became a leader in that church.
Speaker 2:But I say all that to say man, what drives me to do this is this is that you never know who you reach. You never know what word you could say. When you share the word of God from the heart, you never know who's listening. And I know we're in a generation where everybody is about the likes and the number of followers and subscribers so they can monetize their following. I don't begrudge that. That's your thing. Cool If it happens with my podcast, cool.
Speaker 2:But that's not what I'm aiming for. Man, I said this before when I did that powerful episode that's probably one of the top episodes that's still getting thousands of subscriptions, not that the numbers matter when I did Emmanuel a message to the people in the shadows that's what I'm trying to get to those people in those corners in the shadows, where you know the light's not shining, but they want help, they want to reach. They want God to say something. They want God to. They ask God, do you hear me, god? Are you listening to my prayer, god? Do you hear me? God? Are you listening to my prayer, god? Do you see the tears in my face, coming down my face? They're in the shadows, but they're not seen by the crowd, by the church clique. They're not seen in the front pulpit. They're not regarded as worthy, they're not treated with the love of Christ, but they're still important to the Lord. That's what I'm trying to reach.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to reach the next Kevin who's thinking about ending his life tonight. I'm trying to reach that Ann, or that Cleo, or that Jennifer who is confused about her identity or his identity and thinking that they, because of their confusion, life's not worth living. I'm trying to reach that person to let you know you do matter and even if you struggle, if you could just go another day, it's okay. See, nothing else matters, man. I'm realizing as I get older, nothing else matters, man. I'm realizing as I get older, nothing else matters except what I do for Christ, because only what I do for Christ is going to last. Look, there is going to come a time when my life will end. I know that I'm at peace with it, but the thing that lives on after I'm at peace with it no-transcript and I'll move on and God will bring someone else in and that's cool. But long after I'm forgotten, my hope is that these words that I share with you on this podcast will last way beyond my time. The words that God gives me to say to you will last way beyond my lifetime, because now it sticks to me I mean it did before, but now it really sticks to me that that DM he sent me Rob sent me saying he's listening to the podcast. I hope it's that it made an impression on his life, not because of me, but because Christ that lives in me wanted him to hear that we all need to think about those things now.
Speaker 2:I don't know how long we have. All I know is we have to live like today is the only day left, tomorrow's not promised, and instead of living it up like there's no tomorrow, live like there is a tomorrow after tomorrow, not in this world, but in the world to come. So I live. I know I live with eternity on my mind. I live thinking about the next life, not this life, though I make plans for this life for my loved ones. I don't put my treasure in this place. I put my treasure in heaven, where there's no rust, there's no corruption, and I pray that you do too. To the Parlow family, I'm sorry, praying for you guys, hoping God comforts and keeps you. To the Hayes family, praying for you. Pray God keeps and comforts you. And I want to mention one more person. I haven't spoken about him for any of my episodes, but when I was growing up there was a good friend of mine, sean Hilliard, and I'm sure his sister Brandy listens, but I'm not sure.
Speaker 2:But Sean was cool man. He was a good friend of mine Wild hair but he was cool man. He was a good friend of mine, wild hair but he was a good person man. He could run like nobody's business and loved himself some rock and roll. He introduced me to groups like Kiss and Boston and what have you? Sean was good people man.
Speaker 2:A year ago I'm not sure if it was a year or two years ago I found out he died of cancer. A year ago I'm not sure if it was a year or two years ago Found out he died of cancer. And that hit too man. Because I mean, these are people I grew up with and I just wish that's one regret I have. One of my many regrets, I'm sure, is that I wish I had talked to him one more time. I never got to speak to him for you, I haven't spoke to him for decades. I spoke to his sister, brandy, who's still good friends with my sister. But, brandy, to you and your family, I'm keeping you all in my prayers.
Speaker 2:Sean was a good people man. Listen, I wish I had gotten, wish we had reconnected again, but I'm grateful for the time we did have cause. You made an indelible imprint on my life. I pray that this. Thank y'all for indulging me for a few minutes. Just had to get this day off my heart, man, you know, it's just a lot.
Speaker 2:Like I said, death is sobering, you know. But I do realize that sometimes you have to go through the dark to get to the light and I pray that, uh, if you are feeling some kind of way, maybe if you lost a loved one, just don't I mean grieve. Grieve with purpose. Grieve knowing that it's just temporary. You're going to feel it for a while, but it's not the sum total of your life. And especially when we grieve hard I learned this when I went through Grief Share Be a grieve heart that speaks to the depth of love you have for that person.
Speaker 2:Don't let someone tell you when you can and can't stop grieving. Grieve based on what you need and grieve based on your own pace. Don't let anybody rush you out of your grief. But also don't isolate. That's dangerous. Don't isolate, that's dangerous. Don't isolate. Don't get to a point where you isolate, you grieve by yourself and you shut people out of your life, because that's also the playground for the enemy to mess with your mind, as I have learned Just a few things.
Speaker 2:I don't mean to be preachy, so I apologize if I am, but anyway I just want to tell y'all hey, I'm with y'all, I love you. If you need any help, if you need anything, just reach out to us at ALP trinity1.gmailcom or hit us up on our pages on Facebook and Instagram. Listen, love you, be blessed. Thank you for indulging with me and look, we'll be back on track next episode. God bless you. Thank you for joining us at Another Look Podcast.
Speaker 2:We now come to that portion of this series, of this episode, where we offer you the opportunity to receive Christ as your personal Lord and Savior. According to Romans 10, 9, and 10, it says If you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. One believes with the heart, resulting in righteousness, and one confesses with the mouth, resulting in salvation. So if you believe, I want you to repeat these words after me. Dear heavenly father, I come to you in the name of Jesus Christ. Your word says whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be saved, and that's in Acts 2.21. I'm calling on you and I come surrendering my life and my will to you. I pray and ask Jesus to come into my heart and be Lord over my life.
Speaker 2:If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness and with your mouth I make confession unto salvation. I do that now. I confess that Jesus is Lord of my life and I believe in my heart that God raised him from the dead. I ask you, holy Spirit, to come make your home inside of me and live in me. I confess all of my sins to you, lord, and ask for forgiveness for them right now, in the name of Jesus, I receive you, jesus, as my Lord and Savior. I thank you, god, that I am now reborn and a new creation. I am a Christian, a child of Almighty God and a child of the one true King. I have salvation and I am saved. Thank you, jesus, lord.
Speaker 2:You also said in your word Lord, if you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him, according to your word in Luke 11, 13. I'm also asking you to infill me with the Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit, rise up within me as I praise God. I fully expect to receive a supernatural prayer language and speak in that language as you give me the utterance, according to your word in Acts 2.4. In Jesus' name, amen, so be it, congratulations.
Speaker 2:If you prayed this prayer, then you were born again and now have eternal life in Christ Jesus. All of your sins are now forgiven and the Holy Spirit now lives inside of you. The word of God says that everyone in heaven rejoices at your salvation, according to Luke 15, 7 and 10. So right now, heaven is having a party because of your decision and God has a huge smile on his face. If you prayed this prayer, please email us at alptrinity1 at gmailcom so we can hear your testimony, pray for you and send you a gift from this ministry. God bless you and remember this always. Jesus loves you. Amen. Roger, zero G and I feel fine.
